Thanks to YA author Laura Whitcomb for noticing that The Fantasticks (Tom Jones and Harvey Schmidt) is closing after fifty-five years off Broadway. I have a special place in my heart for this musical, having played El Gallo in my senior year at Geneva College. That was well-over fifty years ago but I still recall my favorite monologue. As best I remember, it went something like this:
There is a curious paradox that no one can explain, for who understands the secret of the reaping of the grain? Who understands why spring is borne out of winter’s laboring pain…or why each of us must die a bit before we grow again. I do not know the reason. I simply know it’s true. I have hurt them for that reason…and myself a little, too. – El Gallo The Fantasticks
In the intervening years, the strength of these few sentences has continued to amaze me. Looking back from the perspective of having survived it all, I’ve learned that growth only comes from the pain of living.
The joys of life spring, not from easy successes, but rather from experiencing the hurt of failure that inevitably accompanies everything we do. Joy and grief are two sides of the same coin, the coin that fills the hollows of our lives. That is why the loss of first love has such a profound effect on each of us. It also explains why we glory in the success of a baseball player batting .333 even when that means he fails twice as often as he succeeds.
What does all this mean? To me, it means that true happiness is the satisfaction derived from overcoming our fears. FDR was right when he said our “only fear is fear itself.” This truth has remained fresh in my mind after all these years. Whether it be in relationships or facing obstacles, and regardless of the outcome, success is ultimately measured in terms of how well we conquer that which keeps us from trying.
Batter up!